Becoming a Doll

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July 3rd 2015

1:56 PM

As I lay in bed today all I can think about is getting up and becoming a doll. Today is a busy day. I have people to see, a concert to go to, and the day can’t start untill I get up and do my makeup. I am not one of those people who are obsessed with trying to make themselves look better because of self loathing. I like the way I look, so I treat myself well and enhance my features. The thing is, unlike  lot of girls I know, I really enjoy this process. (except when I’m having a bad makeup day) I have seen a lot of women, especially on my campus, who prefer not to bathe, not to shave or put on deodorant. They find these tasks unnecessary. I don’t understand it.

I receive joy from looking in the mirror and liking what I see. With some music playing in the background, I open the curtains, turn on the lights ans start getting ready. Walking barefoot to my mirror I gaze at myself in a silk robe and underwear. I’m a blank canvas in that moment. I dab my finger lightly at the foundation and apply a tiny bit to my eyes and nose it brightens my eyes. I scrunch up my face and draw on brown, thin eyebrows, sometimes it takes a couple of tries to get them identical. And now comes the time for my most fatal weapon, the single tool that makes girls worldwide shiver at the very thought of it: liquid eyeliner. And not the markers that feel like drawing on your face with crayons or the other tools they have created to make this beautiful art easier, liquid liner. I grasp its handle affectionately and start with the corner of my eye, working my way to the center. My hands are my wipe-cloth, they becoming smudged all over by the time I finish. Red lips, made precise with pencil and my signature perfume or Arabic oils on my neck and wrists.  I clip earings to my ears and finish with mascara after curling my lashes.

Do you want to know a secret ? My weakness ?

Eyeshadow. I’m sad to say I never get it quite right.

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